Friday, 10 December 2010

GPS Rape Alarm

Traditionally rape alarms work by letting out a piercingly loud screeching noise, the idea being that the assailant will flee lest not be caught. But what if you are in the middle of nowhere? Surely then the rapist could just take a couple of seconds to pulverise the sounder and be done with it. Also Rape alarms are generally quite large and require the user to have the device in their hand at the time of use, not always so convenient if you are not expecting trouble.

GPS units have come down in price considerably in recent years and as such many mobile phones now come with thee technology built in. Mobile phones also come with video and audio recording ability as well as just about every other function you can never find a use for.

I suggest the construction of a small bluetooth device which can act as a rape alarm. The device could be a bracelet, ring, key fob or any other small item which may be kept at hand. In the unfortunate event that the device would need to be used it would send a bluetooth signal to the mobile phone will activate the GPS unit and send the co-ordinates to the local emergency services. The Microphone and camera will activate to provide evidence which may be used later to secure a conviction. If the phones speaker is rated as loud enough then that will sound a terrible shrieking noise to alert passers by.

Thursday, 9 December 2010

Dining Brace

Many people wear braces at one time or another to have their teeth straightened, even Tom Cruise has worn a brace, however they are not without problems. There has been a stigma associated with braces and this has lead to braces such as the invisalign brace which is very difficult to see in the wearers mouth. Even with invisible braces there is the problem of oral hygiene, plaque is able to build up on the teeth and lead to decay. Traditional braces encourage this by creating many extra nooks and crannies for food to be deposited, the newer style do this by  being put into the mouth after meals which traps the food away from saliva. It is therefore necessary to brush after every meal, be it at a restaurant or on a lunch break in the office.

The dining brace I have invented combines the new gum shield style braces with a cutting and grinding surface so that there is no need to remove the brace to eat. This surface simply clips onto the existing brace at meal times to allow the wearer to eat food without removing their brace, risking poor oral hygiene.

There is one tiny issue with this invention, what if the wearer accidentally bites their tongue? Well they would likely slice it straight off with the razor sharp blades. This is why I have invented the steel tongue, a sock for the wearers tongue, similar to medieval chain mail, it has the added advantage in that it allows the wearer to withstand hot foods.

Technorati Claim

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This is simply for technorati

Tarmac Caffine Driving Gum


I would not expect motorists to be pay for these repairs themselves but what if something many motorists already do could be used to solve the problem? Many people chew gum in the car sometimes, I know I have, and disposing of this gum can be awkward. Placing the gum in the ashtray causes it to stick in there and stick to any other rubbish.

Todays invention is a gum which could be used to fill the potholes by passing motorists who could simply toss it out of the window and wait for cars to compact it into the hole. Tar is considered a general disinfectant with microbicidal properties and  Finnish proverb states that "if sauna, vodka and tar won't help, the disease is fatal". By using Tar as a base for the gum it would be possible to improve the dental hygiene of the motorist as well as to fill the potholes in the road.

Tiredness accounts for over 10% of all motoring accidents and at least 1/5 of motorway accidents, with tiredness related accidents three times as likely to result in serious injury or death (tired drivers are less likely to brake or take evasive action). By including 100mg of caffeine in each piece, about the same as a cup of coffee, it would be possible to cut the number of road accidents by keeping drivers more alert.

The triple action formula of the gum is as follows:
1. Fills potholes
2. Improves dental hygiene
3. Keeps user alert

Don't delay, buy some today!


Wednesday, 8 December 2010

Beer Cooler Timer

Have you noticed how beer cans these days come with labels that let you know when the brew is cold enough to drink? Well that's great really BUT my fridge is all the way downstairs  and if I bother to make the trip down there to see if it is ready yet then I'm sure as hell bringing a beer back, ready or not. The simple answer could be to buy a beer fridge and put it next to my lazyboy and then I would never need to leave again, while I'm at it I'll turn thee chair into a commode and have a pizza oven installed - sometimes it just isn't an option.
If you really want to know when your beer is ready then we are going to have to get inventive. for inspiration I looked to the other gadgets in my kitchen, why is it that the microwave and oven beep at me when my food is hot but the fridge doesn't beep when it is cold? Well to solve this I have invented the beer cooler timer. 

How it Works:
You take the temperature of your fridge using a thermometer and set the inside dial to that temperature. When you buy a beer turn the outside dial to the picture that represents what you have bought, when it is cold the speaker will sound to summon you back for your refreshing cold beverage. What's more it is magnetic so you can keep it on the fridge or take it up to your chair.

Hair Gel Self Application Comb.

Many gels and products these days claim to give all day hold, but do they? What if it gets washed out in thee rain? What if you need more product? What if you only gel your hair on your way out after work? On top of that, gelling your hair leaves your hands sticky and can be a pain to rinse of meaning each restyle necessitates a trip to the bathroom. And do you really want to carry the whole jar with you?

Enter the gel self application comb. This comb puts an end to the mess, prevents wastage and saves you carrying a whole tub of hair gel around all day. How it works is simple; the body of the comb is hollow and can be used as a reservoir for storing product. The gel is released onto the teeth through a permeable membrane which covers pores on the spine and along the teeth. The membrane ensures that gel does not pour out of the comb. A carry case is to be included, this will prevent any gel being released in your pocket and will also feature a mirror.

Liquitab Gravy

This invention is based upon an experience I had in a Wetherspoons many years ago. For those who don't know, a Wetherspoons is a pub specialising in cheep beer and traditional pub grub, they achieve this by buying beer with a short shelf life and serving low quality microwave meals. I attempted to order a Sunday roast without gravy but was told that this was not possible since the whole meal came pre-packed with the gravy included. This gave me the idea of gravy sachets which are similar to the fairy liquitabs used for washing.

These liquitabs work by using a water soluble pva casing which dissolves when water is added, the liquid inside contains long polymer chains and so does not dissolve the casing. This would not be suitable for use with gravy as the tap would dissolve too readily, but a heat activated tab is another matter. A heat activated tab could be placed onto any plates requiring gravy prior to cooking.

Why not just use a gravy boat? Gravy boats may be fine for family meals but in a kitchen environment they do not hold enough liquid nor do they retain heat well enough, there is also the matter of "skin" which will inevitably form on the top. Gravy liquitabs would reduce cost by ensuring only those who require gravy will be given it.